Better connected

I am now using my very own wireless broadband, registered under my name. Feels good, finally getting connected from my rented room in Bishan. Actually I dropped by Singtel at Junction 8 before getting some groceries, to enquire about mobile broadband plans and stuff. Ended up signing up for one before checking out other service providers. Haha! Not sure whether it was being "spirit led" or purely blur. Gah.... The point is I now have easy access to the internet.

1.5Mbps for one person is a bit more than enough, should have gotten 1Mbps instead. Hahaha! Too late to reggret, already signed a 24-month contract. Even had to give Singtel a deposit worth S$200 for the line.

So anyway, now I have broadband. So what?
Must remember to use it wisely. For example do my learning online instead of wasting incredible amounts of time on the internet. Speaking of which, it is amazing how people(including myself) could be capable of just sitting in front of the computer screen. Not knowing what they(we) have done all day. I find it so scary whenever looking back at one of the seasons of my life, where I was a prisoner of the freedom of internet. So sinful to waste time, haha.


Ok, broadband. Now what?
Gonna install a webcam on the home computer back in Kluang, and teach my family how to use Skype.

Yay!

Feelings, oh Feelings!

They confuse you, they stir your heart and make you go round and round without you having to move physically. They come like a whirlwind and bring you to Bethel or elsewhere depending on where you are inclined to heading. They come in the day and may stay throughout the day. They are there so life would not be dull, but what colour do you want your sky to be in is up to you.

It is nice to be home, home is nice. Home becomes nicer with me in it, hahaha!
Anyway I had a two-week break from classes, so I spent most of it back here where I was born and bred. It feels good to be home! And now I just realised the break was a mid-semester break. Semester-1 of Year-1 ends in Week16, and I had gone through half of it!

Ah, this trip back home is sort of an emotional journey for me too. Lots of feelings were involved, both positive and negative.
The positive ones somehow put some fear and contemplation in me, am going through some stuff that are full of uncertainties which led me to see dilemmas again. Well actually dilemmas are everywhere around us, it is just whether or not we notice or choose to look at them.
There were also a lot of negative feelings that occupied my time here. Various things are happening, I felt levels of hurt that I had not been feeling for months. Also forced to make some painful decisions, decisions that require humility and sacrifice, but fortunately decisions that have potential to free people from a lot of pain. And, again I say there are a lot going on, relating to various persons.


Come to think of it, why do feelings bother us so much? Or actually why do we let them?
Sometimes I see people being controlled by their feelings instead of cognition, those are sad cases in my opinion. However I sometimes catch myself red handed!

Now I am feeling sad and excited as I leave for another eight weeks of school!

Feelings are the tastes to life.  Some of which are pleasant; some otherwise.

Pain gone from the tongue

It is healed! Now I can speak and eat normally, while I appreciate the absence of constant pain in my tongue. Sometimes you suffer and realise the goodness of things that you failed to realise before the suffering. After the ulcer, I appreciate my tongue much more and shall take good care of it.

However my throat seems to be still on strike. It has not really gotten better, yet. Maybe because my eating habits in Kluang has not changed! Roti Canai yesterday, Dim Sum today, what else tomorrow? Hahaha...

Trying to eat less unhealthy stuff and drink more water. In the mean time, sucking Strepsils.
Off for breakfast soon!

Pain in the tongue!

Bit my tongue sometime this week while I was at home. Haha, too much good food that all the eating got me impatient in chewing! Lost quite a bit of blood then, ever since I spent every waking moment in pain.
Unable to eat as fast and as comfortable, is a very torturous thing to happen, especially when good and cheap food is surrounding you.

Now it seems the inflammation has travelled to my throat, it is painful over there too!

Ok, first I can't chew properly; now swallowing is affected also? Argh...
This morning there was blood in my sputum, or was it dark chocolate from last night? Haha!
Anyway, am having a sore throat right now, what a misfortune.

Well, speaking of misfortunes, I consider mine nothing actually. There are so many people out there going through even more difficult times than compared to the pain within my mouth. I remember how it is like to be in the midst of pain and suffering. Nothing is easy when people can neither understand how you feel nor know how to offer you help. At such times it is faith that keeps your world together: Faith in the invisible yet existent forces of unfailing Love, and belief that true friends will always be willing to be by your side though they may not be of practical help.

Pain, something so annoying; something so unavoidable. As pain was designed for the benefit of us, man.

Hospital Sponsorship Offered!!

The one I wanted, the one I wanted from the beginning, since a year ago.
Jesus said, "Ask and you shall receive" and now I say "Praise God from whom all blessings flow" as I stand amazed at the wonders of faith-ful prayers.

I asked for TTSH, SGH came, I gave in and made the first step in accepting the SGH offer. And now I can get TTSH;. Abraham was instructed to sacrifice his only son, and his son was spared when he obeyed the instruction.

The interview at TTSH today was successful, and I am glad the hospital will be offering me a bursary.
Now awaiting the emails, and whatever processes and stuff, as such things need to be black and white.

So much grace, really so much grace, overflowing my cup!

With a thankful heart,
Year-1 Diploma in Nursing student,
yapyapjoel

Hospital Sponsorship offered?

I rejoiced, gave thanks, and struggled. Made a decision to settle for second best since I deserve far less.
But now there is a potential turning point, which I am about to take.

The other hospital that I was more interested in called me up for a sponsorship interview!

Oh how way leads to way, and how they miraculously bring you back where two roads diverged in a yellow wood.

Am so thankful to find myself in the scenes "On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided" where God spared Abraham his son, Isaac after he proved his worth.
So by faith I obeyed and sacrificed, taking the first step of accepting the first sponsorship offer. Lo and behold, the sponsorship I wanted, presented itself.

And now I am scheduled for an interview next Tuesday! Hope it goes well.
By grace, grace that is ever sufficient, I live in contentment.

Hospital Sponsorship offered!

Hospital Sponsorship

What I yearned for and need

To cope with out-of-home living

Much prayer from many

rovidence such as this

Now I, by grace got it

My application to Singapore General Hospital has been successful, but like everything else in this imperfect world, there is grass on the other side of the fence and it looks greener.

Other hospitals also exist in Singapore you know? And there is a particular one which I have also applied to for sponsorship. That hospital is slightly nearer to where I am staying now, and they give a little extra to foreigners. More importantly, I have friends who will be working there. That hospital looks so much nicer and there is where my heart is inclined to. I can continue elaborating on how much greener are those grasses over the fence, but at the end of the day it is directions from the One who provided, provides everything I ought to follow.

As I examined my motives for desiring to go there, I look at myself in the mirror and find reflections of selfishness. I see shame on my face with some conscience left in my eyes. Nursing is what I wanted to do, without greed for wealth in mind, ready to face ridicule and the challenges ahead. However in tonight’s mirror I nearly read, ‘Nursing was what I wanted’ and I nearly wept.


Joel, it is just a sponsorship and God has led you to SGH today though other hospitals might probably take you in. You have never lacked in anything thus far, and you never will, as long as you live not by sight. Now you are given so much, why should you need to want more?

Learn to be grateful, do not argue with grace.

Many incidents in the bible and in life show that doing the right thing is more troublesome, difficult, uncomfortable and inconvenient.

“Why should I settle for less? Why forgo what I want? It’s my my my life!”
Mommy said, “What has been given to you, just take. Learn to be contented.” and I know I should.


A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush.
I am thankful for the one that landed on my hand.

By the way, nursing is about putting the benefits and well-being of others before self; not the other way round.
Time to make a little U-turn.